Super Bowl 50 & My Chicago Bears

This year is the first year that features a Super Bowl matchup between two former first-overall draft pick QBs in Peyton Manning (1998) and Cam Newton (2011). Seems fitting for a milestone event such as Super Bowl 50. This is Peyton’s last shot at proving he can win the ultimate prize without the help of the losing team *coughRexGrossmancough*. On the other side of the field, Cam Newton and his flamboyant ‘dab’ celebrations are being compared to Donald Trump. The short of it is there’s no shortage of high profile stories to go around. Even Michael Oher of ‘The Blind Side’ fame is in on the press tour, with reporters hounding not only him, but the entire Tuohy family about what it means to see him in the Super Bowl.

That’s all well and good but I’m not exactly one to follow tradition (ever). I do like the Broncos, and will wholeheartedly root for them come February 7th, but I can’t shake my love for my hometown team: the Chicago Bears. So with that in mind, I present to you this list of five Chicago connections to Super Bowl 50:

  1. Ron Rivera is known for his defensive-mind. He honed those skills as a DC with who? The Chicago Bears.
  2. Ron Rivera won his last Super Bowl as a player with who? The Chicago Bears. And his last Super Bowl appearance as a coach was with who? The Chicago Bears.
  3. Both Ron Rivera and Gary Kubiak ousted Head Coach John Fox to take over their respective teams. Who does John Fox coach now? The Chicago Bears.
  4. Carolina went 15-1 in the postseason. Who was the last Super Bowl winner to notch at least 15 regular season victories and clinch the title? The Chicago Bears.
  5. The last and *only* time Peyton Manning has won a Super Bowl? February 4, 2007 against who? The Chicago Bears.

So basically, my Bears are in the Super Bowl.

Hey, a girl can dream, right?

chicagobears

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My Miserable Apathy Towards the NHL Lockout

ScreenShot2012-09-16at12.28.27AM_crop_650x440I’m tired. Not just tired; no, I’m apathetic. Even as I write this I had to will myself to start pressing keys on my keyboard. I am just so sick and tired of being sick and tired over this NHL lockout. The only motivation for writing this article was more of an ‘I told you so’ angle.

Back when the lockout started I chronicled my thoughts and ever growing despair about this lockout for weeks. I made it until Halloween. That’s when I gave up hope. I believe it came right after the NHL canceled the Winter Classic: the biggest revenue producing single event the NHL has. But then I remember- I just don’t care that much.

Well now it seems I’m not the only one who has given up hope. The NHLPA itself may have just done the same. The latest rumors are that the NHLPA is going to disband itself, abandoning talks and any hope of rationalizing with the league. Players would then have the opportunity- individually- to bring their own litigation against the NHL. The league itself went forward with a motion to bring lockout negotiations into the New York City Court System. None of these things, simply put, are good. But then I remember- I just don’t care that much.

I want to laugh at anyone who thinks we are going to have a season, albeit a shortened one. Hell, I want to laugh at anyone that even cares anymore. But then I remember- I just don’t care that much.

I want to rant and rave on and on about Bettman, Fehr and Daly. About the sheer incompetence these men and their ‘mediators’ possess. I want to shake all three of them, demanding to know where they get off keeping us puckheads away from our favorite sports release. I want to smack each and every NHL owner that hasn’t been involved in negotiations because of their arrogance. I want to right hook every player that hasn’t been involved in negotiations because they are playing overseas. I want to slap shot a puck at Alexander Ovechkin’s face because… well, just because. But then I remember- I just don’t care that much.

My Blackhawks 2010 Stanley Cup jersey is hanging, collecting dust, in the back of my closet. No need to bring it out- my dad and I won’t be going to a single game this season, which has been a tradition since before the last lockout. All I’m wondering now is what the NHL doesn’t understand about its ability, or rather lack thereof, to withstand its second lockout within the course of a decade? But then I remember- I just don’t care that much.

The NHL isn’t the NFL or the NBA. It’s not even NASCAR. The NFL boasts $9 billion in total revenue per year. NASCAR- $3.3 billion. The NHL projected revenue they are about to lose on this season? $2.7 billion. Nothing to snuff at, to be sure, but it’s still less than NASCAR. The NHL is acting like the biggest diva of them all, when in reality they aren’t even close. In keeping up this attitude they are going to lose fans. A lot of them. But then I remember- I just don’t care that much.

I want to encourage fans to stay the course. I want them to create an uproar- give Bettman and the NHLPA no choice but to figure this thing out fast. I still can’t comprehend why the rowdiest fans in professional sports have been silent these past few months, standing idly by watching as the season slips out from between their gloved fingertips. I want to tell them to care. I want everyone to care.

But then I remember- I just don’t care that much.

Why the Replacement Ref Situation is More Ridiculous Than You Think

The Denver Broncos vs. Atlanta Falcons Monday Night Football game was the absolute last straw. With the real NFL referees still in a lockout, the replacement officials are just simply not cutting it and the league is to blame.

I was one of those people in the beginning of this whole thing saying, these guys aren’t doing that bad for the situation they are in; they only had a few weeks to learn all the rules, cut them a break, blah blah blah. What do I say to that now? “Rule #76: No Excuses, Play Like a Champion.”

Oh yeah, I went there.

Except, I’m not saying that to the refs, I’m saying that to the league. Indulge me in the following analogy:

Remember the NFL lockout last year? Ok, what if instead of creating a work stoppage, the NFL decided to put AFL players in there and still call it the NFL? Guess what? A weed by any other name is still not a rose people. It wouldn’t be the NFL- it would be the AFL, with NFL rules and venues. How can the league think that bringing in Division III collegiate referees can serve as a legitimate substitute for the real thing? Not only do I not call that fair- I call that ridiculous.

What I’m getting at is that the integrity of the game is at stake. Just ask Baltimore Ravens’ head coach John Harbaugh, who called Sunday’s game against the Philadelphia Eagles ‘chaotic’ because of the officiating. Joe Flacco flat out said the replacement refs are affecting the integrity of the game. While Harbaugh isn’t by any means known for his mild manner, Joe Flacco is. When you have one of the least controversial and well-respected quarterbacks in the NFL calling these guys out how can you not acknowledge this is a real problem?

Monday Night’s game was just embarrassing. Not only were they blowing basic calls that my grandmother could have called right (she’s 83 and barely speaks English), they did things like give the Broncos an extra six yards on their touchdown drive that ended the first half. Oh by the way, the first half? It lasted almost two hours. The first quarter alone took AN HOUR. I watched the entire two hours of The Voice and still was able to catch most of the second quarter. Could it be because the Geneva Convention followed every flag thrown, which happened to be every other play?

If these refs can’t call the basics and get spots right, what chance do they have against the ever-problematic pass interference? The answer is none. Too many times in these first two weeks of the regular season I’ve seen great plays by corners negated by bogus 15-yard penalties. Those are game-changing penalties. They are penalties that have changed these games.

These refs have zero control over the game. I heard someone say the players are treating these guys like substitute teachers, which is absolutely accurate. These guys are fighting and jawing at will. What do the refs do? Call off-setting penalties so neither team actually gets penalized. Is it coincidental that one of the most topsy-turvy starts to the NFL season in decades comes when the NFL referees are on strike? Doubtful.

Steve Young said last night that despite all this, the desire for the game hasn’t changed so in the end, the NFL doesn’t care. That might be the truest thing anyone has said about this debacle. It is just sad.

With no new talks scheduled between the NFLRA and the NFL was the Monday Night game still not enough to nudge the commish? Wise up, Goodell. Can I get a ‘Roger, that’?

Your Dislike of Tim Tebow is Misguided

No, that wasn’t a question. It is. Period. Unless of course you don’t have a soul.

Before I get into the infinite reasons there are to like Tim Tebow, which I can’t even believe I have to argue, I am going to start by shooting down the main BS reasons why people don’t.

BS Reason #1 He starts every speech with thanking God: And? If you were the offspring of two Christian missionaries in the position he is in, I’ll bet you would too. Does he go around condemning everyone that isn’t Christian? No. Does he go out and campaign that everyone should join his church and believe in God? No. He just expresses his gratitude for his talent and good fortune the only way he knows how. If there was ever a definition of ‘blessed’, pretty sure Tebow is the poster child. Good for him that he recognizes that.

BS Reason #2 He is ‘too perfect’: This is just stupid. When has Tim Tebow EVER said he was perfect? In fact, I can recall quite a number of times where he’s said he’s not perfect. Sure, the media portrays him as the Second Coming, but how is that his fault? At the risk of sounding too much like Gretchen Wieners from Mean Girls I’m just gonna go ahead and quote it, “I don’t want to be punished for being well-liked.” While having a father that invented toaster strudel is certainly a concrete reason for being well liked, isn’t a quarterback who is genuinely a good person and works his ass off also justified? Why are we punishing him for being a role model, and a fantastic one at that?

Which brings me to another point.

BS Reason #3 He’s overrated: Ok I’ll concede a bit on this one. Sure, his delivery is unconventional at best. Sure, he isn’t the most consistent. Sure, he doesn’t have the mechanics of Peyton Manning. Hey, no one expected him to make the transition to NFL quarterback well. However,  I’m pretty sure he’s made a habit of proving everyone wrong, and no one likes to be wrong. Last season he was the only reason the Broncos made it into the playoffs with those ridiculous fourth quarter comebacks. Did I mention he did that as the backup QB in his SECOND season in the NFL? How could you expect him to be Peyton Manning? If you step back and realize he was a BACKUP maybe you could cut him a little more slack, not that he’d take it.

Enough with the reasons to not like him. This man is a good person. He gives everything he’s got in every situation. I know you all remember Florida’s 2008 loss to Ole Miss and the press conference following:

You will never see any player in the entire country play as hard as I will play the rest of the season, and you will never see someone push the rest of the team as hard as I will push everybody the rest of the season, and you will never see a team play harder than we will the rest of the season.”

And ya know what? We didn’t. How can you hate a man who follows through on his promises? Motivates his teammates? Teaches football (and English) to impoverished orphans in the Philippines every summer?

When you have NFL owners and analysts supporting and making excuses for athletes like Dez Bryant who allegedly beat his own mother a few weeks ago, how can you justify hating Tim Tebow? This man has never been in trouble with the law, never been plastered all over the tabloids with different women each time and no one who has met him has ever had anything but wonderful things to say about him. It also doesn’t hurt that he’s easy on the eyes. Sorry, had to.

So for all of you that claim to hate Timmy, I challenge you to give me one GOOD reason for that disdain. Don’t worry I’ll wait.

The NFL Preseason: Why so serious?

Football preseason is in full swing. HALLELUJAH we have all survived the purgatory known as the NFL offseason. But before you get too excited- don’t. I want to talk about the fact that people can and will absolutely take the preseason entirely too seriously.

Preseason football has little to no implications on how the team will do in the regular season. I repeat: preseason football has LITTLE TO NO implications on how the team will do in the regular season. Notice I said team.

People, the preseason is an individual affair. Preseason games are for rookies clawing at each other like crabs in a bucket for a spot on the roster. Preseason games are a time to preview newly acquired players and see how they mesh with their units. Preseason games are a time to feel out how ‘in shape’ the players have stayed during the offseason. Preseason games are a time of evaluation. Period. It does a great job gauging the successes of individuals ON the team. However, for the team as a whole, not so much.

Yes, my Bears got blown out last week by the Denver Broncos who started Peyton Manning. The Bears, didn’t. They didn’t even start Veal Cutlet (otherwise known as Jay Cutler). So as far as I’m concerned the game, and point for that matter, is moot. Yet, the amount of flack I caught after that game was ridiculous. Scared of big, bad Peyton? Hell yeah we were. If you were a rookie corner trying to keep a receiver from catching a Peyton Manning pass you would be too. But so what? It was the first game of the preseason. Relax.

Last year the New York Giants went 2-2 in the preseason, losing to the Carolina Panthers and the New York Jets. In fact, they had a rather unimpressive regular season as well going 9-7 and just squeezing into the playoffs. You all know the rest of the story.

So before you get all caught up in the preseason games and results, save that sh*t talking for the regular season. Until then, I’m not going to waste my breath arguing with you. I’m nothing if not efficient, you know.

Tale of the Quarterback: Eyes on NFL Training Camp

My nose is acute with the smell of fresh practice field grass, my lips are already fixed for criticism on a cover two versus a man to man, my fingers are (wo)manned on my mouse ready for my impending fantasy draft in a few short weeks. Yes, ladies and gentleman, training camp is upon us, which only means one thing: FOOTBALL IS BACK- CAN I GET AN AARON RODGERS BELT THRUST!? And before you say anything, yes, I’m a die hard Bears fan but you just can’t hate him. Trust me I’ve tried.

This past week NFL players have been reporting to the confines of their cozy college dorms where they will study playbooks and play obscene amounts of NCAA and Madden 12 like the grown up frat boys they are. Throw in some two a days and we have got ourselves some content my friends. I would like to take a look at just which teams will have the most eyes on them this preseason. And so it begins…

Once Upon a Time, there was a quarterback of an NFL football team. His name was (insert really important football sounding name here) and he played for (insert team here), this is their story…

The Denver Broncos: If Peyton Manning doesn’t scream football player name, I don’t know what does. He was literally born to play this role: see related Mannings i.e. Eli and/or Archie. Following (a couple) hush hush neck surgeries and Manning sitting out the entire 2011 season, not only is he back, but he is back with none other than John Elway’s Denver Broncos, despite his already published legacy with the Indianapolis Colts. This Broncos team easily has the biggest target on their back as far as the media sh*tstorm goes. I have to say I have a good feeling about this, and not just because I’m listening to Avicii. The way I see it, Peyton wouldn’t even attempt to come back unless he had complete and total faith that he would return to Peyton Manning form. If Peyton Manning has faith in himself, who the hell are we to say or think otherwise? If Peyton says it, it must be so. End of story. I can’t wait for this next chapter in his career, and have to give a special shout-out to three guys from a certain southwest school I also attended who will be along for the ride. Brock- you learn everything you possibly can from that man, I know I don’t have to tell you twice. O, words can’t describe how excited I am to see you back on that field- and with the Champ! G-Rob, do your thing- and don’t you dare drop a Peyton pass! SD4L 🙂

The New York Jets: Ahh, The Timmy Tebow Saga continues. I can’t wait to see what Rex Ryan version .50 has up his sleeve. Wildcat? Convert Tebow to fullback entirely? Make him the starter entirely? I have to say when they picked Tebow up I totally thought that was it for Sanchez. He’s got the SC quarterback curse, all hope has got to be lost. But maybe Mr. Hard Knocks hasn’t given up just yet. And side note: seriously, can they make Hard Knocks permanently on the Jets? That was by far the most entertaining season. I’m not wrong.

The Washington Redskins and/or The Indianapolis Colts: Picking up the first two picks in the draft, both quarterbacks, mind you, you can bet these teams are on the radar. RGIII was pronounced starter out of the gate. With a definitive ‘guy’ you have to think Shanahan will show at least glimpses of those glorious Denver days. With the Peyton Manning departure, and Andrew Luck of the draw in place, look for the Colts to show up like a Phoenix rising from the ashes. They may not be effective right away, but with the ever accelerated learning curve of Mr. Stanford grad, you gotta think they will get it right by midseason, maybe in time to catch the playoffs? Wildcard at least?

And last but certainly not least, for my own personal benefit, The Chicago Bears: Jay Cutler is healthy. They have signed their workhorse Matt Forte to a sufficient deal. They have gelled their offensive line quite a bit as well as made a key offensive pickup in Brandon Marshall, a familiar target to add to their Cutler-y (ya see what I did there?). The defense, yes, is becoming increasingly more ‘veteran’ but with a more high powered offense hopefully we can preserve those guys a few more years by not having them take the field every 37 seconds.

All I can say is thank God we have the Olympics to hold us over til the real fun begins. Happy training season everyone!

Are You Not Entertained?

Patience is a virtue I will readily admit I do not have. When I get something in my head, I want it done. Like, right now. You can bet that if my neck and millions of dollars are on the line, I’m jumping in faster than LeBron’s hairline is receding. For this reason (among others), I wouldn’t be a very good franchise player.

However, this same ‘patience’ got quarterback Drew Brees a record-breaking $100 million dollar contract with his beloved NOLA Saints. It got Matt Forte a deal right before the deadline of his franchise tender expired with the Chicago Bears. It got the hungry Ray Rice the compensation he is worth.

Maybe I should get some of this patience stuff after all.

I have to wonder though, is this all necessary? As I have mentioned before, professional contracts have gotten out of control, see What Happened to the Nice Guys? Allow me to venture the idea that maybe, the teams, leagues and even we as fans, are actually responsible for all of this.

I mean, didn’t Drew Brees know that the Saints would do whatever it took to keep him? Didn’t the Bears know they didn’t have a fighting chance without Forte, even with Chicken Cutlet healthy? You gotta think the Raven’s knew that Rice’s contributions allowed Flacco the flexibility of a 9-year-old Chinese gymnast offensively.

In situations like Brees, Forte and Rice, these players made it blatantly clear they wanted to stay. When you as a team, know you are gonna give the players what they want anyway, why all the hoop-lah?

I have an answer for you: because it keeps people interested. At the most basic level, sports are just entertainment. Sorry to say it, but it’s true. While you men may think women are crazy for being so consumed with 50 Shades, is your constant monitoring of ESPN and NFL Network really any different? Three words guys: Dwight Howard Trade. Hashtag: #thingsmorecomplicatedthanwomen… can I get a trending topic??

Yeah, it’s patience alright, if patience is spelled D-R-A-M-A.

Maybe if we stopped and smelled the Old Spice we’d all realize that sports would exist without all the twisting plot lines and insane amount of money because of the simple fact sports are a love affair. But they build bonds, they forge new friendships and subsequently break relationships (if only on Sundays). The athletes themselves love to play and we as fans, love to watch. So in the end, that little bit of drama makes it all worth it, God help us all.

Just next time your girlfriend is on the phone catching up with her friend about the latest happenings of The Bachelorette instead of rolling your eyes, think about you and your buddies convos at the bar. You might just be surprised that with a few name changes and metaphors, the nature of the conversation isn’t so different after all.